Become An Inverse Paranoid
In the last issue we introduced the sad story of two friends who were rookie rugby spectators at a stadium. When the players gathered for a scrum and started whispering and encouraging one another, the two friends had different reactions about what they assumed was being said by the players. The first suspected that the players were conspiring to beat them up, and he was dead sure that he had heard something to that effect. The second was totally convinced that the players were indeed talking about them but for a good reason. Since it was their first time at the stadium and they were the only rookie spectators, he was convinced that there was a plan to reward them as a way of encouraging them. The first was also convinced that for the very same reason; that they were new at the stadium; the players did not want them there and were therefore planning to eject them out of the stadium violently. Of course, both of them were wrong, because what the players were engaged in was nothing but a routine rugby ritual of restarting the match after an accidental foul or after the ball has gone out of play.
The two friends represent two contrasting attitudes towards life, which ultimately lead to diametrically opposite outcomes. The first man is the most common. He is what is called a paranoid. The paranoid believes that everyone and everything is conspiring against him to cause evil to visit him. His suspicions enslave him and literally dictate his conduct. Mentally, physically, emotionally and in almost every way the paranoid lives a damned life.
The second man is representative of an inverse paranoid. By definition an inverse paranoid believes that everything and everyone is planning to do him good. Quite unlike the paranoid, the inverse paranoid lives a charmed life and indeed good things tend to follow them.
In this issue we take a closer look at the inverse paranoid.
The Inverse Paranoid Believes In Miracles
The first characteristic that distinguishes the inverse paranoid is that he believes in miracles. He believes and is fully persuaded on the inside that something good will come out of every situation. He does not bother himself by trying to figure out exactly how the miracle will come by, he simply believes that somehow events, people and the universe will converge and act in a manner that will advance his interests and his well being. His approach is summarized by one simple statement, "All things work together for me."
He believes that people are on his side and not against him. He believes that events are God sent not manufactured by the devil. By doing so he primes himself to receive the best out of everyone and out of every situation.
The Inverse Paranoid Has A vivid Expectation of Good
The inverse paranoid not only believes, but actually actively expects good things to happen to him. He is constantly in a state of what Charles Dickens would call Great Expectations. Our expectations have a huge impact not only on our health but also on our state of motivation. Compare and contrast the emotions, attitudes and actions of two ladies; one on death row expecting to be executed any time and one on the morning of her wedding day. Both of them are not likely to be in a neutral gear. When the bride hears the sound of footsteps from her chamber, she immediately imagines that the groom has arrived to take her to the wedding hall for the solemnization of the vows. On the other hand when the lady on death row hears sounds of footsteps she imagines that the hangman has arrived. If the bride sees a man dressed in a priest's garments she is betrayed into believing that the priest who is to conduct the vows has arrived. However, when the condemned lady sees a priest is betrayed into believing that he has come to read the last rites before she is hanged. They are actively expecting different outcomes for the day. Hence, they are in different emotional and psychological states.
This may seem simplistic but it is very important. Over the long haul our actions are actually shaped by our expectations. Our actions in turn influence the outcomes we get; thus our expectations actually become self fulfilling prophecies. For this reason alone the inverse paranoid tends to live a charmed life while the paranoid tends to always attract the worst possible outcomes.
Attitudes Are More Powerful Than Facts
There are two elements that are ever present in any situation. These are attitudes and facts. The two have mutually reinforcing effects. Our attitudes influence the progression of the facts because facts are not static but continuously changing in response to it taken. On the other hand, attitudes cannot be insulated from the outside facts.
The instinctual tendency is to allow the facts to influence one's attitude. However, the winning approach is to clothe oneself with an attitude that one can actually influence developments in a positive direction. It is a proven scientific fact that people can change the outcomes they get in life by first changing the attitudes of their minds by conscious endeavor. Attitude is a product of conscious choice and decision.
No one is born a paranoid or an inverse paranoid. These are acquired attitudes. They are learned behaviors which can also be unlearned. The first step to becoming an inverse paranoid is to make a conscious decision to work towards becoming one. One can never become an inverse paranoid incidentally, coincidentally or accidentally. Conscious endeavor is the key. The decision to become an inverse paranoid should then be followed by another very important decision; to give the most generous interpretation to events and human behavior. Nothing is bad by itself, but our thinking makes it so. All sound human relations are based on the assumption of the existence of goodwill between interlocutors. Without the assumption of goodwill, paranoia sets in.
The books you read, the company you keep and the imaginations you entertain also have a huge influence over whether you become paranoid or an inverse paranoid.
Original article